The Emperor's New Clothes

This is a modern day adaptation of a classic short tale by Hans Christian Andersen about two weavers who promise an Emperor a new suit of clothes that are invisible to those unfit for their positions, stupid, or incompetent. The moral of the story tells of the pitfalls of giving in to courtly pride and intellectual vanity rather than adulterous paternity.The tale has been translated into over a hundred languages.

Once upon a time there lived a vain CEO who was obsessed with Process Re-engineering. He changed organization structure and shuffled roles every month, much to the frustration of his employees.

Word of the CEO's idiosyncrasy spread over his industry and beyond. Two scoundrels who had heard of the CEO's obsession decided to take advantage of it. They introduced themselves at the lobby of the office with a scheme in mind.

"We are two very good consultants and after many years of research we have invented an extraordinary method to re-organize a hierarchy so lean that it looks invisible. As a matter of fact it is invisible to anyone who is too stupid and incompetent to appreciate its quality."

The chief of the HR heard the scoundrel's strange story and sent for the CFO. The CFO notified the VP, who ran to the CEO and disclosed the incredible news. The CEO's curiosity got the better of him and he decided to see the two scoundrels.

"Besides being invisible, Sir, this structure will be tailored in a management style created especially for you."

The CEO gave the two men a million dollars budget in exchange for their promise to begin working on the re-org immediately.

"Just tell us what you need to get started and we'll give it to you." The two scoundrels asked for a room, financial statements, and computers and then pretended to begin working. The CEO thought he had spent his money quite well: in addition to getting a new extraordinary consultation, he would discover which of his staff were ignorant and incompetent. A few days later, he called the old and wise VP, who was considered by everyone as a man with common sense.

"Go and see how the work is proceeding," the CEO told him, "and come back to let me know."

The VP was welcomed by the two scoundrels.

"We're almost finished, but we need a lot more cash. Here, Sir! Admire the solution, feel the efficiency!" The VP bent over the monitor and tried to view the screen which was blank. He felt cold sweat on his forehead.

"I can't see anything," he thought. "If I see nothing, that means I'm stupid! Or, worse, incompetent!" If the VP admitted that he didn't see anything, he would be discharged from his office.

"What a marvelous configuration, he said then. "I'll certainly tell the CEO." The two scoundrels rubbed their hands gleefully. They had almost made it. More financing was requested to finish the work.

Finally, the CEO received the announcement that the two consultants had come to request access to company records needed to complete his new org chart.

"Come in," the CEO ordered. Even as they entered, the two scoundrels pretended to be holding large stacks of printouts.

"Here it is Sir, the result of our labour," the scoundrels said. "We have worked night and day but, at last, the most cost efficient business structure in the world is ready for you. Look at the PDFs and visualize how powerful it is." Of course the Emperor did not see any printouts and could not feel any paper between his fingers. He panicked and felt like fainting. But luckily the throne was right behind him and he sat down. But when he realized that no one could know that he did not see the fabric, he felt better. Nobody could find out he was stupid and incompetent. And the Emperor didn't know that everybody else around him thought and did the very same thing.

The farce continued as the two scoundrels had foreseen it. Once they had taken the records, the two began typing on the keyboards while printing with their printers on invisible paper.

"CEO Sir, you'll have to retrench all your current senior management to implement this solution." The two scoundrels flashed the blank presentation. The CEO was embarrassed but since none of his bystanders were, he felt relieved.

"Yes, this is a highly effective setup and it looks very good with me on top," the CEO said trying to look comfortable. "You've done a fine job."

"Sir," the VP said, "we have a request for you. The people have found out about this extraordinary strategy and they are anxious to hear your broadcast." The CEO was doubtful of showing to the people a presentation he could not see, but then he abandoned his fears. After all, no one would know about it except the ignorant and the incompetent.

"All right," he said. "I will grant my staff this privilege." He summoned his PA and the ceremonial parade was formed. A group of boot lickers walked at the very front of the procession and anxiously scrutinized the faces of employees in the conference hall. All the employees had gathered, pushing and shoving to get a better look. An applause welcomed the elitist procession. Everyone wanted to know how stupid or incompetent his or her neighbor was but, as the CEO passed, a strange murmur rose from the crowd.

Everyone said, loud enough for the others to hear: "Look at the CEO's new business strategy. It’s excellent!"

"What a marvelous concept!"

"And the leanness! The leanness would surely ensure huge cost savings! I have never seen anything like it in my life!" They all tried to conceal their disappointment at not being able to see anything, and since nobody was willing to admit his own stupidity and incompetence, they all behaved as the two scoundrels had predicted.

An intern, however, who had no important job and could only see things as his eyes showed them to him, went up to the stage.

"The display is blank," he said. “There is nothing on the stage except the CEO himself”

"Fool!" his supervisor reprimanded, running after him. "Don't talk nonsense!" He grabbed his intern and took him away. But the youngster's remark, which had been heard by the bystanders, was repeated over and over again until everyone cried:

"The kid is right! The presentation is blank! It's true!"

The CEO realized that the people were right but could not admit to that. He though it better to continue the presentation under the illusion that anyone who couldn't see his slides was either stupid or incompetent. And he stood stiffly on the stage, while behind him a clerk held his imaginary folder.

Sundown Marathon 2010

And they shall know No Fear

Their feet shall be swift like the winds, their endurance like the endless tides,
their fortitude like steel, and their morale unshakable, the fiery souls of immortals piercing the misty night.

With their minds at peace, their pace in check, hearts beat in unison, and they shall stride in harmony across the moonless blight.

The winds will rise, the rain beats down, their thighs will burn, their pace will slow, but they’ll never be broken, and they shall know no fear.

And with the crack of dawn they return as one, the first and the last man march abreast, silhouettes against the horizon’s first light. The standard bearer waves his flag, and the crowds roar in delight, as the runners end their triumphic flight.

Fare thee well, for the end is near

keep floundering until the bitter end, and die in pitiful futility

And I dare not raise my head to look upon, that which has come to bring my end.
I shivered in cold awkward fear, and would turn tail and flee, had my body obeyed me.
My right arm heeds not, and my legs turn numb, I all but spasmed a little, which was all that’s left in me.

Bemirthed by my desperation, it glanced upon me and laughed. A laughter so hollow, more devoid of humor, than a corpse’s final stare.
“Finish me” I muttered, the last of what my crushed spirit could muster. “Finish me I say, End it now” a final show of defiance and nothing more.
But its capacity for cruelty, of this world it came not. The end it did not bring, instead unto my mind's eye it burned, the vision of what the end will finally bring.

And then in the dark it left me, knowing, and knowing the certainty. The many moons to anticipate, all the frightful more made the wait.

Eclipse

And it was written, at the chosen hour on the chosen day,
the sky would become black, day turns into night,
the frost princess shall be reborn, her metamorphosis complete.
she rides a cave troll to battle, and orges answer to her calls.
such eternal beauty, yet chilling to the bone...

So engrossed in their oblivious ways just mere moments ago, the monkeys now tremble in terror, the legend was true after all! Meteors shall fall, lightning smite the unworthy and oceans of flames to drown their cries.
They stared at where the sun should be, they sniffed the air, imagining the smell of sulfur and brimstones.
The usual excuses will not save anyone, for all now are equal and there were none to blame. Some pretended to be cattle, disassociation being their defense against awareness, while others beat their chest lamenting "how unfair". Here a monkey offered his unfinished bananas, there, another one volunteered to work harder, as if the last feeble pretense of diligence would somehow redeem their souls.

It got darker even more, and they knew all was lost, and faintly whimpered of how they would become better primates if only there was another chance...

Looking at the heavens with tears in their eyes, only the stillness of remorse remains.

Now the darkest hour has come to pass. The monkeys stared at one another. Mildly embarrassed, they gratefully returned to their daily lazy ways.

The blessed, and the least favored -Session1

There is one, and then there is the other.
By virtue of the alignment of the constellations it was decided.
One, the heir apparent, another, the family's bane.
This is the story of the later.

He should have been cast into the river upon birth, and was fortunate such was not the case. Resigned to his banishment, he only sought a humble existence among fellow peasants. Even while he lived in the House, simple folk fare had always been his preference. He only wanted to live in peace.

Yet the same Kingdom which rejected him, would not leave things well enough alone. His calling came least expected, and in the guise of fame and fortune, was the option of more or less certain death.

Much was said of why he chose to go, yet the true reason, himself does not know. Fame and title appealed little to him, nor did he care much about saving the Kingdom from a rebellion. A 'romantic' some would say, but a cynical man has few emotions, and honors he needed none.

He stood before the nobles, ready to embark. To receive their blessings. To hear the words they wish to say, and to say the words they wish to hear. Towards the wonderful promises of rewards, he held no expectations. Between the path of nails and the path of needles, he simply chose the path they chose for him.

To be continued...

Unbias Bab~

ill found anger

His cause was just, his purpose true. His anger mighty, his warcries bellowed deep.
"How dare the pale one be so bold!" The pale one who now trespasses his soil, who points a finger at his pride.

The pale one must pay! The tribe stands ready, his fist points the way. HE who is the light of the land, HE who bears the mark of the greater beaver, HE the servant of the peaceful hammer, who must now deal justified violence, for the greater good...

Meanwhile on the other side>
Harri simply didn't understand what the fuss was all about, he only wanted to borrow a pencil...

“A reasonable man adapts himself to suit his environment.
An unreasonable man persists in attempting to adapt his environment to suit himself.
Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”
- George Bernard Shaw

Another monkey bites the dust

the stillness of remorse was all that remained

His cold stiff body was discovered slumped over the desk, the constant hum of a still functioning low noise laptop grimly loud in the glowing silence. sound effects from an ironic graveyard screen saver periodically interrupts the peace, reinforcing that morbid reminder of the harsh realities facing modern day hunters...

Great Pink Shark

Co-Aurthored Story

Inevitably, the aristocrat resists his final duty
— which is to step aside and vanish into history

Much feared was Phoebe the Great Pink.
but alas she found herself sitting in a little tank. not quite the great throne room she had planned.
Space was less than half it was, in misery she lament her loss.
No pink seaweed to hide behind, from around her the view which irks her mind
The sight of bottom feeders, happily going about their business.
"Good morrow" they greeted her, secretly they mocked her.
She calls out to her minions, desperately seeking reassurance.
but alas they're long gone, like the migrating turtles that's moved on.
the sucker fishes she used to carry, all left seeking the next swollen belly.
be it pink, yellow, soft or hard, care not, so long they too partake in the fresh offered cup.
Gone now the shroud of fear, as memories of her fade and disappear.
those who were happy, let them be happy still,
those who were greedy, let them be greedy still.
But let those who think her gone, soon learn they were wrong, oh so very wrong.
In the dark she bids her time. She'll have them pay for their crime.
plotting her righteous vengeance. on her treacherous turncoat traitor legions

Of Monkeys and Bananas

A visitor saw the circus master using a dice to decide which monkey will get more bananas. The visitor was shocked and said "you can't decide this way, its not fair!"
To which the circus master replied "No Sir, I'm not trying to decide, I've already decided."
"Then what are you doing?"
"I'm just double checking if my decisions are correct"

The watermelon seller

There was a watermelon seller. The nobles loved her because she sold the sweetest watermelons. She could always produce the best watermelons any time of the year, even when no one else has has any stock.
She could always produce the watermelons even on short notice, it was as if she made them appear magically.
And she would only sell her sweet watermelons to the nobles.

The peasants on the other hand hates her for forcing them to eat the rotten watermelons.

And the farmers hates her even more, for stealing their watermelons.

One King to rule them all

It all begun with a lack of resources to cast “resurrect hero”. The king resorted to necromancy, For a while “raise dead” worked, mighty heroes of old returned, bonded to our King’s will, completely obedient, uncompromising, and emotionless. They were unstoppable, at least for as long as the price was paid.

But the ways of the dark side was above comprehension, above any mortal. Even above a King who believed he could outwit the very forces who has now made him just another pawn.

Seduced by power, our young king finally embraces “dark contract” the most forbidden summoning spell.
Of the eternal damnation of himself and the entire kingdom, the King accepted, reluctantly at first and then welcomed with open arms, as he rapidly approaches the last stages of degeneration.

In the scheme within schemes, the first temptation was always only a beginning. A foothold to a path that may change in a million ways, but the result was always the same. The most noble intentions eventually twisting into complete enslavement to the whims of the dark side.

- The millions who fell didn't make a dfference

They could have been CAMs too

The beautiful pristine re-engineered surrounding conceals the once battle scarred landscape and the countless deaths that occured here. Even after all these years, it is said that on moonless nights, the spirits of the 'Banished' can still be seen stalking the hallowed grounds, silently bemoaning their horrible fates. On such nights, if one listens carefully to the wind, one may hear the whispering. Dark terrible half-truths which can either inspire a fresh aspiring cadet to great feats or reduce him to hopeless despair.

- A tribute to those who fell from favor.

Doom was inevitable but the battle must be fought, yet the glory can be eternal!

The setting sun cast a crimson glow over the gory remnants of a devastated CAM's fortress. The cold silence only interrupted by haunting winds whistling down the bleak desolated landscape where once stood the proud citidel of the CAMs, left to decay in the passage of time, as the relentless inquisitors mechanically march on to their next victim...

- 2007 3hours after the audit.

Little Miss Loud

ORIGINAL VERSION:
***DELETED***

POLITICALLY CORRECTED VERSION:
Mr Nonchalant had an incredibly boring group outing. He most likely will not again meet those girls in future.
Little Miss Loud on the other hand was excited to have gone out with Mr Nonchalant.
So thrilled was Little Miss Loud that for some unknown and less that rational reason, had to sprout it off to everyone, describing the "date" down to the finest details.

Mr Nonchalant was disgusted with having the whole world subscribed to this distorted truth.

Ending:
Little Miss Loud who looked forward to having Mr Nonchalant for her upcoming party, would never realize what went wrong. Nor would she get to see Mr Nonchalant again.
Mr Nonchalant didn't show up, he found better things to do.

And they lived happily ever after

******* The End *******

The feline's choice

A man saw a cat in the pound, it was playful and got along well with the other animals. He liked it and took it home. Took it away from all it's companions.

He knows that everything he does is for it's own good.

He was proud of it and often displayed it to his friends.

It was the 1st year and the man went traveling.
The cat was lonely and made friends with a stray pig.
The man returned and became angry that HIS cat has paid attention to anything other than himself. "Why can't you just sit there and wait for my return, I was only away for 11months"
He killed the stray pig. It was for it's own good.
The cat was deeply hurt but kept quiet because it cared about it's owner's feelings.

It was the 2nd year and the man went traveling.
The cat was lonely and made friends with a stray dog.
The man returned and became angry that HIS cat has paid attention to anything other than himself. "Why can't you just sit there and wait for my return, I was only away for 11months"
He killed the stray dog. It was for it's own good.
The cat was deeply hurt but kept quiet because it cared about it's owner's feelings.

It was the final year and the man went traveling.
The cat was lonely and stared at the door awaiting his return.
The man returned and became angry. He didn't believe it had sat there quietly waiting for him "It must be hiding something! And I was only away for 11months"
He locked the door so that it couldn't run away. It was for it's own good.
The cat was deeply hurt. It cared about it's owner's feelings. But couldn't take it anymore. It finally ran away through the open window.

Moral of story:
The Man didn't chose the cat. It was the cat that allowed itself to be owned, he could never have prevented it from leaving.... if it really wanted to.

And they lived happily ever after

******* The End *******